tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post6519600398144816255..comments2024-03-25T06:39:42.081-04:00Comments on Bonfire of the Vanities: How 'gay marriage' will change 'marriage' for all; and it'll be bad for womenFr Martin Foxhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01375628123126091747noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-39271906864904857882013-06-17T18:27:05.508-04:002013-06-17T18:27:05.508-04:00I wonder how gay marriage will change when gay chi...I wonder how gay marriage will change when gay children are raised by accepting parents in an accepting society? Right now what role models do gay couples have? What influence does our faith have in the lives of gay people. With acceptance perhaps good traditional marriages will influence gay marriage!<br />Liz H.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14360852551385564583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-28623128891711047092013-06-10T16:29:48.035-04:002013-06-10T16:29:48.035-04:00Father, this is all very disturbing.
Mr. Savage i...Father, this is all very disturbing.<br /><br />Mr. Savage is frightening. I'm truly sorry for the little boy he and his boyfriend are raising. <br /><br />The life of a gay man is not all rainbows and parades. I grew up with a lot of gay men in my family. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Many of their problems are within themselves, but they blame lack of acceptance from the rest of the world.<br /><br />And they have a lot of sex with a lot of people...sometimes all in one day! (Sorry if this is TMI, but it's what you learn with a gay men in your household)<br /><br />The sexual revolution has been very, very bad for women. When every girl will say "yes," there's little reason for a man to put a ring on your finger or treat you with respect.<br /><br />We women have less bargaining power than ever before.<br /><br />I am getting a divorce, and I won't remarry. <br /><br />What convinced me was a wonderful book I found in the library by Fr. Benedict Groeschel called "The Courage to be Chaste." I've never been happier, and life has never seemed so right!<br /><br />Since I am a Mormon, these ideas are all new for me. Every Mormon wants to get married--but I do not. I have found that I can trust in Christ much more easily than in another person. <br /><br />This is not naive optimism, but a choice to trust in God and to just take care of my children rather than running off to search for the "perfect stranger."<br /><br />I enjoy reading your blog and learning about the Catholic Church. :)Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11200221356189037181noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-71308043186739524902013-06-09T17:42:05.860-04:002013-06-09T17:42:05.860-04:00In Savage's podcasts and columns, he makes a c...In Savage's podcasts and columns, he makes a clear distinction between "cheating pieces of crap" (slightly sanitized version of a phrase he uses often) and monogamish--the big difference being honesty. In a good monogamish relationship, both partners have consented to outside activity (for at least one of them), with clear rules about what is and is not acceptable, and more important they follow those rules. <br /><br />The definition of marriage has changed many times through history, and almost all of these changes were positive for women. They are no longer property, they can support themselves decently without a husband, their consent is required for sex even with their husband. <br /><br />Current marriages are free to be sexually open, or as closed as ever--Allowing recognition of gay marriage doesn't change that. <br /><br />Sevesteenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10167315201563562644noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-65233026908112677752013-06-09T08:35:58.675-04:002013-06-09T08:35:58.675-04:00Andrew
Why yes there is - the US Military (under ...Andrew<br /><br />Why yes there is - the US Military (under UCMJ). And, it is not preposterous. Why?<br /><br />Well the Military is an amazing group. For the most part, (until the last 15 or so years), the military must face reality. <br /><br />An off topic example - the world has a hierarchy. There is a chain of command - regardless if the group is a family a business, a state or the military and regardless of whether they want to admit it or not. The military faces that with no apology. They don't claim there aren't ranks and levels - in fact they wear it on their uniforms, they physically acknowledge it (salutes, standing at attention, putting the ranking person to the right) and they expect more of their senior ranks than they do the junior ranks. It is very clear who is in charge in any military gathering. <br /><br />The military expects its men and women, particularly its officer to tell the truth and behave with high standards. Because whatever you practice day to day is what you will do in battle. (Hence the phrase - train like you fight) So - if you have a habit of lying or cheating - then what do you think happens when its a really stressful situation?<br /><br />Likewise, the military faces (or at least did face) the reality of sex and marriage. Sex creates a bond - more so for women - but still for men. (At least the men with a high enough character to command others in battle.) And marriage and family - well that is even higher bond. <br /><br />The good discipline and fighting ability of a unit is poorly effected if it has one soldier (or worse an NCO or Officer) banging the wife or girlfriend of another soldier in the unit. Additionally, the ability of a solider to focus on the task/mission at hand is poorly effected when they have to wonder what their spouse is doing at home and with whom.<br /><br />It is also a black-mailable offense which is why you lose your security clearance if caught up in it - as well as bouncing checks, being too deep in debt, etc.<br /><br />These used to be the standards of all leaders - political, business, minister, leader of the Kiwanis. But then the canard of 'It doesn't matter what he does in his personal life....' came into play. <br /><br />To be clear - there are sins - like adultery - (which is a sin regardless of who 'gives permission') that ought not be civil crimes. That doesn't mean that it doesn't poorly effect the communities that they work and live in. <br /><br />But there are organizations like the military where it is NOT preposterous. Jackiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16252872986381733863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-39949694342026685512013-06-09T02:35:33.406-04:002013-06-09T02:35:33.406-04:00Is adultery - between adults and without the use o...Is adultery - between adults and without the use of force - still criminal anywhere?<br /><br />Grounds for divorce, yes, but a criminal offence?<br /><br />I hope not. The idea is preposterous.Andrew Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17273362558325263161noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-43156810499827121052013-06-08T18:19:06.525-04:002013-06-08T18:19:06.525-04:00My point, phrased as a question, is this: if the ...My point, phrased as a question, is this: if the article is correct, and a consequence of gay marriage could be that some married straight people (my neighbors Jim and Judy) might feel more free to change their rules of their marriage so that Jim gets to have the occasional tryst with a waitress with Judy's "permission" and "without jeopardizing" their marriage, why would I, as their neighbor, oppose it?<br /><br />Pathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02395546579597858011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-37741850537467976752013-06-08T15:01:26.460-04:002013-06-08T15:01:26.460-04:00Pat:
Because I think your comment kind of evades ...Pat:<br /><br />Because I think your comment kind of evades my point, while in a way actually confirming it: namely, that redefining marriage to include same-sex unions will change marriage for everyone.<br /><br />Or maybe I'm misreading you, or imputing views to you unfairly.<br /><br />But it seems to me, up till now, advocates of redefining marriage have insisted that, oh no, this won't change marriage <i>per se</i>, and won't affect the larger reality.<br /><br />Now that there seems to be serious momentum for redefining marriage, it's seems safe to switch tactics, and say, oh sure it'll change things! Go for it!<br /><br />But, to be fair, maybe it's unfair to put all that on you. <br /><br />Let's just say I won't be surprised if your response ends up being what tends to come more broadly from the pro-redefinition camp. Other things I've seen suggest that may bear out.Fr Martin Foxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01375628123126091747noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-26594571639589471282013-06-08T14:54:39.966-04:002013-06-08T14:54:39.966-04:00why?why?Pathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02395546579597858011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-4903728971222041582013-06-08T12:14:50.426-04:002013-06-08T12:14:50.426-04:00I think you're being disingenuous.I think you're being disingenuous. Fr Martin Foxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01375628123126091747noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14168956.post-29001924132272464462013-06-08T10:27:45.847-04:002013-06-08T10:27:45.847-04:00"... it will eventually embolden boyfriends e..."... it will eventually embolden boyfriends everywhere (and not a few husbands) to press for what men have always wanted but few were allowed: sexual novelty, in the form of permission to stray without jeopardizing their primary relationship."<br /><br />At the risk of sounding radical, doesn't sound so terrible. To me, the words "permission" and "without jeopardizing" are words that indicate a successful contemporary marriage.<br /><br />So, the article says that a result of gay marriage COULD BE that SOME straight couples will together agree to allow each other (more probably, the husbands) to have the occasional sexual encounter outside of the marriage, "without jeopardizing" the marriage.<br /><br />If my neighbors Jim and Judy feel that works for them, I'm OK with that. It's not what I want in my marriage, but if it works for them and their family, God bless.<br /><br />Maybe it will result in fewer straight divorces? Like in post-gay marriage Massachusetts.<br /><br />Radical? Maybe. But I see the sense of it.Pathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02395546579597858011noreply@blogger.com