The best seat in the house (22nd OT Sunday homily)

When we are children, we all have those moments 

when we are trying to get mom or dad’s attention. 

Look, mom! Look! Look! LOOK!!

Of course, our parents want to look and see what we’re doing;

But they might be driving, or fixing dinner, 

or getting other work done, and they can’t always look. 

They might even get irritated.

But let me tell you something, 

and this is true no matter how young, or how old, you are: 

parents never stop wanting to look at their children. Never.

Whenever I have a baptism, afterward, I ask to hold the baby.

You know what happens: if the baby is peaceful and content 

in her mother or father’s embrace, once she’s in my arms, 

she getting agitated and cries. 

Then, when I give the baby back, he’s calm again.

That infant recognizes his parents but doesn’t recognize me.

That connection literally begins with conception, 

and is cultivated in a thousand ways from that point on.

That complex reality of love and trust and interdependence

is absolutely necessary for each of us to be healthy and balanced.

Not just as children but throughout our lives.

On the other hand, some children do not experience this, early in life, 

and that can leave a wound that can take a long time to heal.

All this came to mind because of what happens in the Gospel:

People jostling for the best seats; 

not because they are most comfortable, 

but because they gain the attention of the host.

They want to impress or push some agenda.

But consider: if you have a solid relationship with the host, 

why do you need any of that?

This is the key to true humility: knowing who you are; 

having that peaceful, confident relationship with God.

What passes for humility – downing myself, denying our gifts – 

is actually false humility.

Accepting mistreatment, being a doormat – 

is not only false humility, it is a destructive distortion. 

And so, let me state this clearly:

Never does God expect any of us to endure abuse or degradation!

If you’re being mistreated, at work or at home, that’s never OK.

Get help. Don’t wait. Ask someone you trust. You can talk to me.

True humility comes from having that good relationship with God, 

and therefore, having security and confidence. 

That enables you and me to acknowledge our gifts 

and accept our weaknesses. We know who we are in God.

Then there’s no need to impress anyone.

So, the natural next question is, how do I get to that place?

Just as baptized child needs to be in his or her parents’ arms,

So you and I need to have a strong relationship with God.

Without that, we have a spiritual wound, an insecurity.

We don’t fully know who we are.

That friendship with God requires more than an hour a week.

It needs periodic apologies and patching things up;

In spiritual terms: a regular examination of ourselves,

And frequent use of the sacrament of confession.

And, let me explain something a lot of people miss.

The real success of a fruitful confession is less about 

what happens in the “box,” in the confession room, 

and far more about what happens in the 30 minutes beforehand.

I mean, specifically, the way we examine ourselves spiritually.

There are many guides available, just look online 

for “Catholic examination of conscience.” 

It’s always a series of questions, based on Scripture, 

to help us see what we need to see, and then, confess.

That helps us overcome fear and grow in holiness.

Today is a good day to ask: do I have that friendship with God?

And to do the work to build that friendship.

Then any seat in the house is the best seat.