I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ, and him crucified
-- St. Paul, I Corinthians 2:2
"Before we're done here tonight, one of you will be voted off in tonight's episode of "Theological Survivor."
"Pssst! I think he's asleep...who's going to wake him?"
So let me get this straight: you are asking me to preside over a joint marriage ceremony?
I'm thirsty. You guys thirsty? Waiter! A round of Schneider Weisse, bitte. Danke.Let us pray: Benedic, Domine, creaturam istam cerevisae, quam ex adipe frumenti producere dignatus es: ut sit remedium salutare humano generi: et praesta per invocationem nominis tui sancti, ut, quicumque ex ea biberint, sanitatem corporis, et animae tutelam percipiant. Per Christum Dominum nostrum. Amen.Amen.
"So, you'a like'a the floor aye. I had'a some'a orphans do it, its'a mosaic of'a the dark'a side of the moon. They gotta the big'a impact'a crater and everything."
The German Theologian was a little nervous, since this was his first appearance before the Holy Office.
The Pope himself captured it"I am feeling like I am in court"And the first questions asked:"Can you hear us or do we need to shout ?".....;-)They finished 10 minutes earlier than planned, the pope's comment "Thank God, it's over"
"Get BEHIND THE LINE! No feet in my circle!"
"Why are you all sitting so far over there? Do I smell or something?"
Not having a real table or armor, the Pope does his best to live out his fantasy of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table.
"I have a little trouble remembering names so if it's okay with you gentlemen I'll just call on you as Mr. War, Mr. Famine, Mr. Pestilence and Mr. Death."
The Holy Father was overheard to say, "Don't think you're out of my reach over there... I will still punish stupid questions with a whack upside the head with my crozier!"
In a scene from the upcoming final episode of the Matrix quadrilogy entitled "Matrix: The Revelation", an older and much wiser Neo, armed only with ultimate truth, takes on the final four Agent Smith clones in a battle of faith and intellect.
You're four lawyers from America, you say? Well, that's close enough then.
"Journalist! Can't like them; can't beat them with my crozier; what's a Pontiff to do?
Can someone get Dr. No's prop-cat in here so we can roll cameras?
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